Video Archives - Helping Up Mission

“I’m a runner,” says Joseph. “I’ve been running all my life… and now I’m 61.”

As a child, Joseph remembers walking in on his father abusing his sisters. After quitting school, a traumatized young Joseph fled his home and began living on the streets. Sleeping in empty stairwells or abandoned cars, he befriended local addicts who turned him on to drugs and alcohol at the tender age of 9.

“I tried to commit suicide during my teenage years,” Joseph says. “I didn’t love myself. I hated myself.”

After surviving a decade on the streets, Joseph began selling drugs – living with different women and fathering several children of his own. Police came looking for Joseph after he began missing child support payments. Again, Joseph ran and hid.

After locating him, local authorities checked Joseph into a hospital psychiatric ward. His assigned psychiatrist recommended Joseph come to Helping Up Mission.

Joseph refused… intending to flee again. But his sister insisted. Having survived the same family circumstances and addictions her brother suffered, she begged Joseph to listen to HUM’s experienced staff. She told Joseph this was his last chance at life.

Through generosity like yours, Joseph began receiving treatment, healthcare, spiritual counseling, and a new vision of his future at HUM. For the very first time, Joseph says he feels alive as his suicidal tendencies have subsided.

“When you’ve been told that you were nobody your entire life, that you would never amount to anything,” Joseph tears up, “It takes coming to a place like this to change everything.”

“After getting sober here, I learned that I could be successful at something. Before, I never completed anything. Now, for the very first time, I’m completing things. God even blessed me with the gift of music.”

Through singing, producing, and playing gospel music, Joseph found a favorite outlet with which he could thank God for giving him a second chance.

Even Joseph’s children have seen the changes in their father and begun visiting him. “I failed at being a father,” says Joseph. “But if I can help just one of them now, it’s never too late.”

Joseph is excited about graduating from our Spiritual Recovery Program and returning to society. He’s learned how to cope with his inner child, replacing the reflex to escape with a new focus on personal aspirations.

“I thank God for Helping Up Mission, it’s such a blessing. I’d be dead without this place. Thank you so much for giving me my life back.”

Enthusiasm spreads across Joseph’s face when he shares his plans of reconnecting with his kids and shooting a music video for his song, aptly entitled “Then came Jesus.”

Fear has been replaced by faith. Today, Joseph doesn’t have to run anymore.

“I came from the depths of hell. But now I want to live.”

—Joseph

Help more people like Joseph today…

Joseph’s story of hope and healing at HUM is incredible… and made possible by you. Our Spiritual Recovery Program offers men and women the guidance and love to change their lives forever. Give a gift now to help more people like Joseph experience a second chance and a new way forward in life!

“I can sleep now. I can breathe. And I can rest.”

It’s a miracle that Ryan is alive today…

In an act of “tough love,” Ryan’s parents kicked him out of the house when he turned 18. His addiction was growing out of control. Ryan was gripped by so much fear and anger – it seemed like the bottom of the bottle was his only way to cope.

But would he survive the streets?

“There were times I was caught in torrential downpours or even blizzards,” Ryan recalls. “And I just had to cuddle up and hope that I was good.”

It wasn’t until Ryan found himself trying to survive on hot sauce packets and peppermints that he realized he’d had enough.

When Ryan came to Helping Up Mission, he was immediately overwhelmed by the kindness and compassion he experienced…

“I got hot chicken, a warm bed, a hot shower, and clean clothes,” Ryan recalls from his first day at HUM. “I felt reassured that I can sleep now. I can breathe. And I can rest.”

Not only has Ryan earned his high school diploma since coming to HUM, but he was welcomed into our Spiritual Recovery Program with compassion – and without judgment. He felt loved and was immediately struck by the breadth of our services and programs.

“The Spiritual Recovery Program helps to teach you about yourself. Having a new way of life, where you don’t have to live in fear, but that there’s a God who cares, loves, and will provide.”

Today, Ryan continues to work in our Spiritual Recovery Program. He dreams of one day attending college, so he can pursue his passions of writing and photography.

“Coming here gave me a new hope,” Ryan says.

Please help other people like Ryan…

Through our Spiritual Recovery Program, people struggling with homelessness and addiction are being transformed from the inside out and are discovering new lives filled with hope for the future. And it’s all made possible by caring friends like you.

“God, this is it, I’m done. Please make something happen.”

Listen and subscribe to A Shot of Hope: Recovery Stories

Struggling with addiction for over 20 years, Ramon (39) asked God for help, “God, this is it, I’m done. Please make something happen.” Thanks to generous donors like yourself, Ramon’s prayers were answered, and he came to Helping Up Mission (HUM), where he has healed, “spiritually, mentally, and physically.”

Born in Guatemala, Ramon’s family moved a lot: from Costa Rica to the Dominican Republic, to Puerto Rico, and the Virgin Islands. His father, a preacher in the Seventh Day Adventist church, and his mother did a good job of making his family feel safe during the many moves. “I never liked to be in one place for very long. I got used to moving and liked meeting new people and discovering new cultures,” recalls Ramon.

Being raised Seventh Day Adventist, with a strict ethical code against the consumption of alcohol, Ramon did not have his first drink until age 19. That all changed while in college. “That first night, I drank two forty-ounce beers. After that, I never drank casually. Drinking was all or nothing and I always drank to get drunk and I didn’t care about the consequences.”

Ramon’s “no-care” lifestyle would continue for another 15 years. Much like his childhood relocations, Ramon would often move to change the situations, yet his addictions would resurface. “Through the geographical moves, I now realize that I was the problem. I had always blamed my situations on other things.” Ramon moved to California to live with his sister, but his addiction resurfaced and he moved to Texas with his brother. “I thought that if I were around my brother, everything would get better. But I wasn’t happy and quickly started isolating myself. I moved back with my parents who were living in New Jersey, and repeated the process. My father got transferred to Maryland, and I moved too. The pattern repeated: I got healthy again but started drinking.

In Baltimore, Ramon got arrested and while in detention asked, “God, this is it, I’m done. Please make something happen. That is when I met John. He said that he knew of a place that would help me. I did not see him again and I was released. We never exchanged information and I did not know how to find him. But through coincidence, or more likely by GOD, John was there when I returned to get my things. And that is how I found Helping Up Mission.”

“The hardest thing about the Spiritual Recovery Program at HUM is living in a dorm with 30 guys, although it is cool how the men come from all walks of life. Learning to stay still, letting the ‘fog clear’, and taking direction were also hard at first. But they (staff) provide us with so much and there are so many opportunities to carry us through the year. I joined the choir and connected with the group Brothers in Prayer. I signed up for everything that HUM had to offer, like backpacking. I joined a recovery homegroup and attended Celebrate Recovery.”

Throughout the year I also stayed connected with John. He said he had a job opening for me when I was ready. At first, it was hard to find a job because of my past. But HUM helped me expunge my criminal record, and I work for John now at Sofi’s Crepes Fells Point. A job that I can walk to! It has been a blessing.

As Ramon looks ahead to his future, he is thankful for HUM teaching him to sit still and just letting God lead. “I passionately want to be a Peer Recovery Specialist. I want to help people get over the hump of addiction. I know what they are going through, and I want to show them how they can start from nothing and relearn what they know about God, religion, and recovery.”

“My relationship with God today is very personal. Recovery has really helped me see His love for humankind, but we must find out how to love ourselves first. God has given me the gift of being comfortable around people. Because of my upbringing, I trust people, and that is what I want to help instill in others. By trusting in God, like when I prayed to him from the detention center, He opened the door and placed John into my life.”

“Today, I am most thankful for my health and my life. My family stuck with me, even when I was reaching a point in my life where (it seemed) there was no coming back. I am thankful for God bringing back my sanity (Recovery Step 2). And I am thankful for love allowing me to adapt to and accept people where they are. I am grateful for HUM healing me: spiritually, mentally, and physically. If I had the opportunity to go back and talk to myself on my first day I would say, ‘Ramon, you are at the right place. God brought you here. It’s starting now!’ “

Thanks to donors, volunteers, and partners like you, Ramon is well on his way to becoming a Peer Recovery Specialist. His true life-transformation is a testament to your generosity on many levels. And the hope that Ramon provides the men and women that we serve is immeasurable.

Keith, 55, was born and raised in Baltimore, Maryland. From an early age he was recognized for being gifted in the Arts. Being a talented dancer and singer helped Keith rise quickly in the theatre world, yet his self-doubt and eagerness to be accepted led him down a dark path. This is a story about redemption.

Keith attended the Baltimore School for the Arts as a voice major and then switched over to dance and got courted by the Dance Theatre of Harlem. He received a full scholarship and moved to New York to pursue ballet. People immediately took notice of his talent and intended to make him into a star.

“It was a really interesting time because once I got to New York, it was like, okay… I’m here… I had a year and a half of training as a ballet dancer, which is not a lot and I’m in a school with all of these people who were hungry for something that I knew nothing about, and it wasn’t one of those things that I was hungry for. But it was something that somebody wanted me to do and I found myself doing that a lot in my life. They saw what I didn’t see.

My mother was always very supportive of me, but I always had some insecurity. I was always a soft kid, being bullied. Overcoming this was difficult, and his own father didn’t help. I remember one time my dad said to me “you’ll never be like your brother.”

That really stuck and manifested into “I’ll never be as good as this person. I’ll never be a good dancer. We carry these insecurities with us throughout our lives. I remember one time as a kid asking my mother, “Why don’t people like me?” and she said, “Everybody’s not going to like you.” I always wanted to be accepted.

I performed in a production of Sophisticated Ladies with Maurice Hines, which was such an adrenaline rush, and I started drinking a lot. I started disconnecting from my friends in New York, because everybody’s working and I was not. Looking back I realize that I was just creating this idea in my head. So then I started making new friends. Once they see that I’m cool we’ll be friends. I started buying drinks for all of my new friends. And then I started buying other things.

I knew these people didn’t really like me. They just liked my money. I was going to have a great time getting high with these people or getting high,period, not with these people. Finally, one time when I was sitting on the floor with a crack pipe in my hand, I looked down at myself and thought,what are you doing? So I called my sister-in-law. She’s a very strong believer, and she said, “I knew that you were going to call.” She took me to church.

I just felt something every time that I went to church. It was like I was crying out. The Pastor suddenly said, “There’s one person that I have to pray for,” so he pointed me out and he told me that they’ve been waiting for me for a long time.

Shortly thereafter, I came to the Helping Up Mission. I started going to the classes, writing, reading, Praying, meditating, and getting stuff out that wasn’t good for me.

These were blessings, gifts, I was given so many things that took me places that I’d never go. That part of my life is over, and I thank You, God, for giving me an opportunity to do all the things that You allowed me to do. I changed paths and got my CDL license.

And then something strong came over me and I started giving myself ballet classes, four or five days a week. I realized, He’s preparing me for something.

Soon people were asking me to come and teach master classes ballet classes. So I’m thinking, God, what is this that You want me to? I prayed on it and the following day I got a call from a woman who has as a conservatory. She made me an offer that I could not refuse. I cried because I knew I had nothing to do with it. I knew that was God working in my life. You know that this is a gift that I was given. I love the beauty of it.

I teach kids and they come with insecurities, and I totally understand that because I had my insecurities. Having the opportunity to see the same kids six days a week and to watch them grow… I love doing it.

In the dance world Keith felt like an outsider. This past year he has learned what acceptance feels like. It’s just talking to God of acceptance and a welcome of Grace.

I ask for His guidance.

At HUM, I’m fed every day and my blessings are just crazy. It’s crazy. Thank you guys. My compassion for those hurting is stronger, keep a watchful eye on them. I just pray that people can feel good, because we don’t have that long on this Earth. We have so much to be grateful for. That’s something that I hope for, and especially for the guys here. They’re always a part of my prayers. There’s a Holy Spirit that moves through this place. It’s all throughout this building, you know, and I just pray that we find what we need in order to move through life. We just have to get out of His way and let Him do His work.

Randy says that it is all about relationships. Randy grew up Catholic, but by the time he was 10 years old, his family stopped going to church. As he got a little older, he tried to find something spiritual. He says that “he always believed there was a God, but not in the structured way, or [he] only conceived of an angry, resentful God.” Randy always thought of himself as a good person, to whom bad things happened. Before entering the one-year residential Spiritual Recovery Program (SRP) at Helping Up Mission (HUM) in 2016, Randy lost his father, mother and close friend all within a very short period of time. Maybe he had to lose all of these people to stand on his own and establish new relationships.

In the first few days at HUM, instead of losing people, he started to gain real friends. Kim Lewis, one of HUM’s Board members who co-leads the Choir and Band with Kirk Wise, invited Randy to join the choir only days after entering the SRP. Randy had never sung publically, although he had always performed in orchestra and band. He was extremely nervous when he started singing, particularly as he was one of two men singing tenor high parts. Choir helped fill up his weekend with positive activity when he was on “blackout” (restricted to campus for 45 days). Now, Randy has joined the choir at his “home church”, St. Leo’s in Little Italy, and sings regularly at mass. He also attends recovery meetings on Sunday and Wednesday.

Music has become a huge part of his life. Randy comments, “It calms me down and has so much emotion”. Kirk also teaches a class called “The Power of Music”. Randy remembers a specific song that powerfully impacted him called “The Sower”. It compares people to soil and that with hard soil, God has to get in there and help break it down before nutrients and seed can be planted. A massive tree emerges as the result of the hard work.

Miss Kim also connected Randy to Monday night Bible Study at HUM, which is part of Randy’s weekly routine. Randy started helping out with playing the videos for Monday night Bible study, which taught him how to use the A/V system, a skill needed for Treatment Intern duties that were eventually assigned to him. Another door opened!

The Spiritual Retreats have also provided vital opportunities for life change. In the past and when he first entered the SRP at HUM, he always had to fill his time and space – filling the boredom led to drug use. But now, he feels better, describing this as “inner peace”. Randy explains, “I’m OK with myself”. He has moved from bored

om (or fear of it) to calm. He credits the spiritual retreats as part of this, attending Camp Wabanna, Bon Secours and CREDO.

Camp Wabanna contributed to this calm Randy feels by helping him be by himself. Randy doesn’t play sports, and so he spent time in the beautiful environment sitting and reading his Bible. Within a group of 300 men in the SRP at one time, it can be easy to just see people in passing, but Randy felt that he took the time to really get to know people on this retreat.

At Bon Secours, he learned a discipline called the “Daily Examen”, crediting it for changing his life and outlook. He says, “It has put a new spin on life”. He used to think about what he didn’t do or accomplish in a day, but after learning the examen, he is reviewing what he accomplished over the day. It has turned his all of his thoughts from negative ones, to positive! He is sleeping better as a result, too.

Additionally, Randy has realized life “isn’t all about [him]”. Instead of reacting to everything in dramatic fashion, he is praying about things. He hadn’t realized before how much anxiety he was experiencing before because he dealt with it by “drinking and drugging”. He has realized that whatever is going on won’t kill him and that everyone has to suffer sometimes. He is starting to see things through God’s eyes and in a Christ-like form. He has been “promoted” to an Intern at HUM, and where he gets so much joy out of seeing other people grow – he’s so grateful.

Randy is really learning how to build relationships

Randy has now been at HUM for nearly one year, he is performing his role as an Intern in the Treatment Office, and has entered a process of discernment with the Catholic Church about priesthood. He is seeking balance in life rather than vacillating between working crazy amounts and avoiding people with “me time”. He is learning to take little of everything at the “buffet of life”, but not overindulging on anything. Randy is really learning how to build relationships and says that “he never had friends like at HUM.”

Randy helps other people find their path!

In his role as an Intern, Randy has to deal with a lot of different personalities. He learns that he can’t put expectations on people because they all come from different backgrounds. And he is learning how to manage his own expectations about himself. If he can make it through the day without a drink, that is enough sometimes. This is some good training for him, particularly if he receives a call to priesthood, as he looks forward to working with people from all walks of life and helping them find their own way. This is really what gives him joy – helping other people find their path! And, it would not have been possible without the integration of spirituality in HUM’s programs.

Nick has been able to rebuild his relationship with his mother and brothers, and now he can help others do the same!

Nick is the youngest of three boys whose parents divorced when he was young. He admits that he was spoiled and played both parents to get what he wanted. His brothers stayed with his mom most of the time, but Nick would go back and forth between both parents. He liked to stay with his more lenient dad, who was also an addict.

At the age of ten, Nick started drinking alcohol and using marijuana. When he was twelve, he was using regularly. His addiction got worse, and by the time he was fifteen, Nick’s mom sent him to a recovery program in Utah. He hated the program, and was angry at his mom for sending him. He explains, “I always loved my mom, more than anything in the world. She was a wonderful lady, but I was always mad at her for that.”

While he was in Utah, Nick didn’t use, and completed two years of high school. He thought he had recovered and wanted to return to Maryland to be a normal student and play sports for his senior year. Nick convinced his dad to get him out of the program and let him come back to play football and baseball.

Upon returning, Nick earned the starting quarterback role on his varsity team. He drank occasionally, and once the football season was over, he drank frequently. During baseball season, Nick hurt his arm and started taking pain medication which he became dependent on..

He played baseball for a year in college, but his reliance on pain medications led to a heroin addiction, and soon, Nick didn’t want to do anything other than feed his habit. He quit school and managed to survive for several years with the help of his father.

He eventually moved back with his mom, but he wasn’t able to hold a job or have a relationships. Again, his mom tried to help by bailing him out when he got in trouble and sending him to rehabs. One of the programs had a spiritual focus, and that was where Nick discovered his desire for a relationship with God.

Unfortunately, he returned from one of the rehab programs to find that his brother had started using, too. Nick returned to his old ways and even began to sell drugs out of his mother’s house. His mom had finally had enough and said they couldn’t live there anymore. Enraged, Nick went to Las Vegas to live with his father. “I was not nice about it at all. I could not control my emotions. I am a completely different person now. I don’t even recognize the guy that I used to be.”

Nick lived two and half years in Vegas. He was always high, repeatedly arrested, and at one point found his father on the floor unconscious from an overdose and with a blood infection from shooting up. In the end, Nick was living in a trailer that didn’t have power or water. He was exhausted, and when his aunt came out to bring him home, he returned reluctantly to the East Coast.

Nick has a family friend on the Board of Helping Up Mission who recommended that he and his brother come to HUM. Although Nick was not ready to stop, his brother was ready, and came to HUM’s Spiritual Recovery Program. He recalls “I wanted to stop, but I didn’t want to.” As Nick went through several other programs, he realized, “I didn’t really want to live. I didn’t want to die. I didn’t want to do what I was doing, but I couldn’t stop.” He kept trying and kept slipping up, but all of those places helped keep him alive until he was ready to stop. “I always believed that once I was ready to stop, I could with God’s help.” Nick called his brother after he had messed up again, and his brother suggested he come to HUM.

Nick remembers walking through the door and just crying. He was worn out and wanted to stop. When he came in it felt good and safe, and he could finally let his guard down. At HUM, he could focus on what he needed to do to get better. He had the chance to address the root causes of his addiction. For the first time, Nick didn’t immediately seek out a social circle. Instead, he focused on his recovery and did the work he needed to recover.

One thing Nick had to work on was his relationships. He was tired of hurting everyone. When his mom came to visit, it was tough to see her, and they both cried. She visited every week and welcomed him home.

There were years that Nick didn’t communicate with his mother, and there were times she enabled him, believing she was helping him. Eventually, she made the tough choice to say “whenever you are ready, I am here.” It was certainly tough for him to hear, but now Nick proudly declares that his mother is “the best woman I ever met. She is loving and caring and always did everything she could for my brothers and me. She always put us first.”

It has been almost a year since Nick graduated from HUM. He now works as an Intern in the Program Office at the Mission and helps other men find their way. Thanks to you, Nick has been able to rebuild his relationship with his mother and brothers, and now he can help others do the same!

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I grew up in West Baltimore – in Sandtown. There was my mom, my younger brother and his dad in the house. But, I didn’t know he was my step-father; I thought he was my dad until I was 12 when we moved out to Park Heights. It was hard when I found out he wasn’t my biological father, but I realized eventually that he was my “dad”.

My relationship with my mom, even in the middle of my mess, was good. She would always try to find a way to help me get better.

I started trying drugs when I was 8 or 9 – marijuana. But, it wasn’t an every-day thing until I was 15 or 16 because of limited access – by then I had a job and associates to get it from. I started using cocaine at 17.

I put myself out of school when I was in 8^th grade [by acting out]. My mom wouldn’t let me be in the house unless I was learning, so the principal that expelled me from Greenspring Middle helped me get into an alternative school. Just two weeks from completing my GED, I got in an altercation and got myself put out again.

I left home when I was 19. From 17 on, I was back and forth with girlfriends and families in a couple places. I met my daughter’s mother and she had my daughter. Her mom didn’t want anything to do with me because I didn’t have a high school diploma or college. But, I always kept a job.

I could always go home, but I chose to live on the streets. Whenever I would call my mom, she would say I could come home. But I told her I was alright, and I was under the illusion that I was taking care of myself.

I first came to HUM in 1998, when I was 28 years old. I only stayed for a week. I tried other recovery programs over the years, including another time back at HUM. I spent time in jail – for things I did and for things I did not do. I had jobs on and off – which also provided access to substances.

On Memorial Day 2012, the love of my life was taken away from me. She was murdered, and I lost my mind. I tried everything not to feel what I was feeling. Marijuana didn’t do it. Coke didn’t do it. As I was on my way to go buy some coke, an associate asked how I was doing. I said that I was trying to find something to numb the pain. He gave me a gram of raw dope. I didn’t like the way it made me feel, but it took away the pain. What I didn’t realize was that my using heroin to take away the pain was causing me even more pain. I came home one day and the locks were changed.

Eventually, in March 2016 I found my way back to HUM. I didn’t talk to other people when I came here; just the people who came in with me. We made a pact to be here for the year. Since I have been here, I’ve been dealing with my anger and changing my heart.

When the euphoria of getting high was gone, I became a very, very, very angry individual. I was angry at myself, angry at the world, and angry at the dude that took my wife from me. In my second week here, I was going to leave, but my Father [God] sent my Treatment Coordinator to come talk to me. I told him, “It’s my birthday and I don’t want to feel what I feel. The only way that I know how to deal with it is to get high.” He suggested I talk to the Director of Spiritual Life about my anger. I was looking for the quick fix – I thought he would give me a verse or a book to go read, but it wasn’t that simple. He gave me a bunch of reflective assignments. Every time I was in the recovery process, I thought it was about changing my thinking. But for me, it wasn’t about changing my thinking, but about changing my heart. And everything else will follow.

Now, I’m staying at HUM; I’m working on getting my high school diploma and I’m responsible for the housekeeping in three buildings. I’m working on other things, like vulnerability. I don’t have a problem being vulnerable to the Father because I know he is not going to hurt me and has my best interests; my problem is being vulnerable with people. Learn to distinguish which people who have your best interest at heart. The people at HUM have my best interest at heart. But I resist it; I don’t want you to know that I have any vulnerability in me. I don’t want you to know that I have the fillling of a Twinkie in me. Sometimes there’s a time to be angry, but I just don’t want to be angry anymore.

I don’t know what’s next for me; I just go where my Father tells me to go and do what He tells me to do.

Here’s a WBAL news segment that featured Anthony early in his time at HUM:

Watch the video above, as Wayne describes his process of forgiveness…

Wayne grew up in a violent home, with a stepfather who regularly abused his mother. From his preteen years on, Wayne planned to get revenge by killing him. But after several decades of consuming hatred and active addiction, Wayne was able to get clean and forgive his stepfather. He eventually even cared for his stepfather through the final stages of cancer.

Wayne has always loved to cook. Now, he’s training to become a chef. In the video below, you can see more of his journey as described by his sister, along with the recovery stories of two other men.

Aaron Benn, age 30, grew up in the Cherry Hill neighborhood of Baltimore. “I ran away from my Dad when I was 13 and moved in with my mom,” says Aaron. “She let me do whatever I wanted and I thought that was the life. I stole my mother’s car when I was 15 so she kicked me out. I went back to my dad but in the 10^th grade, I dropped out of school and ran away.

“I started selling drugs at 15. I was arrested for attempted murder at age 17. I was innocent and eventually released. I earned respect from the guys in the neighborhood for getting locked up but not telling on the person who did it. That only encouraged me to dig deeper into the street life.

“I had experimented with drugs before but my addiction really developed at age 18 when I tried Percocet after a basketball injury. At age 27, I tried heroin for the first time. Not long after, a federal indictment come down in Cherry Hill and 40 people were locked up – half of them were my close friends. I stopped selling drugs because I didn’t want to be involved in that. But, I still had my drug habit and I could no longer afford it after I stopped selling drugs.

“Everything started falling apart. I couldn’t pay my bills. I left my girlfriend and went into isolation thinking that would be better for me and help me get over using. Instead of helping, my addiction became 20 times worse. I left my place and went to stay with my uncle and started selling drugs again.

“I grew weary of the life I was living. I finally woke up and realized I didn’t want to go any farther down the path I was on. I knew I had been raised better than that. I went to my aunt and uncle’s and asked them to help me. I told them that I wanted to get clean and to get my life right. My aunt told me about the 3 day detox program at Johns Hopkins Bayview. As I spent time in detox, I realized that if I was going to turn my life around, I would need extra help. A 3 day detox program wouldn’t provide me with the support that I needed to make a total life transformation.

“I called my aunt and asked about rehabs in Baltimore. She told me about Helping Up Mission and I called and got all of the information. That day that I came to the Mission, I woke up in the morning and asked God for a sign. I’m a big Ravens fan so, as I got dressed that morning, I put on all of my Raven’s gear. When I arrived at the Mission, they told me that the players from the Ravens were coming for the annual coat giveaway. Joe Flacco, Torrey Smith and several other big name players were there. I felt like that was my confirmation. I said, “Okay. This is it. I’m running with it!”

“The first 45 days in the Spiritual Recovery Program were literally the best 45 days of my life. I took that time to get to know myself. I attended all of the meetings and classes that I could and took everything in and applied it. I also attended several of the “HUM U” life enrichment classes – healthy relationships, manhood, anger management, grief and loss as well as others.

“As I progressed through the program, It was so encouraging to hear success stories from the program graduates. From my perspective as a young black man, it was so encouraging to see program graduates that I could related to on the HUM staff. Watching them, I knew that I could clean myself up and get myself together.

“On the first day that I was eligible, I started working on earning my High School Diploma through HUM’s education program. I received my High School Diploma in September 2015.

“I joined HUM’s running team through Back On My Feet. It was so helpful to be able to interact with people outside of the program who genuinely cared about the program members. I started both participating in and volunteering for races in the community.

“The staff at HUM helped me to get my driver’s license and helped me to pay for it through money that was available through Maryland RecoveryNet. For the first time in my life, I’m officially a licensed driver!

“I became an intern in the kitchen. While I was in the kitchen, I met Pastor Reggie from Morgan State. He was volunteering in the kitchen. He encouraged me to start volunteering and working with kids. I did that for quite a while but eventually the volunteer opportunity was over.

“One of the HUM staff members let me know that there was a man from Acts4Youth coming to the Mission. He had volunteer opportunities available that could possibly lead to a job opportunity. I met with him and started volunteering for the summer program. At the end of the 4 week program, he told me he liked the work I was doing. Shortly after, I had an official job interview and began working for them in October. I mentor the kids. We teach them through team building activities. We help them learn to communicate and work well together. I want to reach kids in the whole city. God is not taught to kids enough and the city needs this message. The change in the kids that we are working with shows. We often get good reports from their teachers.

“I graduated from the Spiritual Recovery Program in November 2015. Things are looking good for me! I have my diploma, my driver’s license and a job that I love! I recently moved off of HUM’s campus in December. As for the future, I’m engaged to be married on July 3^rd of this year.”

Watch Aaron’s interview at our 2016 Graduation Banquet:

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Z7XY9OguvbA

Drew Dedrick, age 43, was raised in Columbia, MD. “I grew up in a good Catholic family,” says Drew. “I did well in school. I played football, baseball and painted scenery for the drama club and was an artist for the newspaper.”

“I had always been a normal guy. As I entered middle school I got glasses, braces and crazy hair due to my many cowlicks. I wasn’t cool anymore. I desperately wanted to fit in. I felt like good students were nerds so I started making an effort not to get straight A’s.

“After high school, I enrolled in UMBC and joined a fraternity. I did nothing but drink my entire freshman year. I felt like it was required to be part of the crowd and it helped me to feel accepted. By the end of my freshman year, I had failed out of college.

“I started working at Toby’s Dinner Theatre as a morning dishwasher. Within weeks I was promoted to working with props and stage managing. From there I became the technical director and finally a sound designer.

“In 1999, I married my girlfriend — an actress I had met at the theatre. We had a good life together. She eventually left the theatre and got a job as a teacher.

“Our first son, Martin, was born in 2004 and our second, August, arrived in 2007. After August was born, she wanted me to get a “real job.” She didn’t think that my job at the theatre had the long-term security that a day job could provide. But, I was comfortable at the theatre and knew that I was very good at what I did.

“After August was born, the disconnect between us grew. She had matured and become a proper mother but I hadn’t made that adjustment with her. She kept asking me to drink less. I hesitantly agreed but never made any real changes.

“We reached a point of crisis in our marriage. She gave me an ultimatum that I needed to quit drinking, quit smoking and get my health checked out. I told her that was a lot to ask for and I didn’t know if I could do all of it. I went to the doctor the very next week. I tried to quit smoking without realizing how hard it would be. I never was able to stop drinking. After six months, right after Thanksgiving 2013, she kicked me out. At first I fought for her and our relationship but eventually realized that it was futile — she was not going to take me back. Not being able to be with my boys was devastating.

“I still had my job at Toby’s and I would sleep in my car and at friends’ houses. It was freezing cold and so I drank to keep warm. My wife told me I couldn’t drive the boys anymore. Once that responsibility was gone, I drank whenever I wasn’t at work. I drank all day long. I got to the point where I would shake if I wasn’t drinking. My doctor prescribed me anxiety medication. Because I was taking it along with drinking, I started blacking out. I started getting progressive warnings from my boss about showing up drunk to work.

“From May to October my life was just shame upon shame. I was hallucinating. I was very paranoid and stopped talking to people. I thought I was going to die – I didn’t believe I had any chance to control my alcoholism. I was only getting ½ hour of sleep every night and drinking didn’t even get me drunk anymore.

“I finally realized that I needed help. My step-mother helped me look for programs and found Helping Up Mission. She brought me to HUM and I was an emotional mess. I had been isolated for so long. Suddenly, I was in a community of guys all working on the same thing and it was like an enormous weight had been lifted.

“I surrounded myself with good people. For the first time in my life, I started following the rules. Anything the staff asked me to do, I did. I got a sponsor, a home group, developed a great relationship with my treatment coordinator, fully used my therapist and started attending church.

“As I progressed in the program, I had to decide about going back to work right away or waiting. I prayed on it and decided to accept a work therapy assignment in HUM’s treatment office. I wanted to give back to the place that had saved my life! I eventually accepted an internship in the Philanthropy Department. My family wrote a letter lashing out at me for taking an internship instead of a full-time job. They wanted me to re-enter the workforce and provide for my boys.

“I recently was offered the opportunity to interview for a position in HUM’s Philanthropy Department as the Marketing and Communications Coordinator. As I read the job description, I was amazed – if I could have written it myself, this is the ideal job description I would have written. A couple of weeks later, I was offered and accepted the position. Working at Helping Up Mission is a calling. It’s a place where I can help save lives.

“Because I am able to live at the Mission as a residential staff member, I am saving money and able to make financial amends to my ex-wife. My family apologized to me for writing that letter and doubting me. They now realize that I was doing the right thing all along, by surrendering to God’s will and am now in a position to give back to my boys immediately.”

Watch Drew’s interview at our 2016 Graduation Banquet:

https://youtu.be/Z7XY9OguvbA?t=2m21s